Carp Fishing Reconsidered.

Part of my lack of fishing this year was because all of my equipment was scatter the four ways of the wind. We were living in Town Center in Virginia Beach. I had all my gear about 7 miles away in a storage unit and most of the time this year I didn’t feel like grabbing it. I think I landed up filming one session with my friend Ryan and that was it.

So in an overzealous attempt to get more subscribers on my Youtube channel I made the mistake of posting on a “true” carp anglers page and caught wreck for it. How do I know that he is a true carp angler? The following indications point to him being the real and genuine article.

First off, carp fishing is “thinking man’s fishing” or that is how the line goes. I can tell this guy thinks a lot. It takes a lot of thinking to mix ingredients that you can purchase at Walmart for under 10 bucks or if you want to show your “passion” you can opt to buy your bait from one of only a handful of carp bait companies operating in America, they are selling the same thing except at a premium rate. There is some 80 year old lady on the internet repackaging and selling it if you don’t believe me. Now I am trying to figure out where the thinking comes in is it in the location, time, temperature, composition of bait. Because these factors are a part of all fishing. If you are new to carp fishing let me break it down, this is what you need for basic carp fishing: oatmeal, panko, jello (strawberry), whole kernel corn. The thinking you will need to do is to figure out what proportions in order to make the right consistency.

I think the common misconception is that here in America carping is a thinking man’s game. I think in the UK it definitely is because where they fish they definitely have a lot of angling pressure. Here in America all you have to do is be smart about where you make a cast and you are going to be on the money. Statistically, if you have a fish that eats like a pig and is nomadic and you present some good looking bait that looks better than the crap they are eating off the bottom you are going to be successful. So don’t say that chumming the water is somehow a thinking man’s technique. Oh maybe “boosting” your baits with secret sauce is what it is all about. Secret amino acid chains that strip the carp of their defenses and eat everything in sight. Maybe that is part of the thinking game owning a lab where you are producing weapons grade fish bait.

A funny thing that a guy from the UK in all his excitement told me was that I should stick to bass fishing. Well, all things considered they are considerably more elusive prey and if I was doing UK style I would chum the water with shad and then wait for them to bite. I forgot they like to call it “tactics” over there. Like it is some sort of special operation.

Oi!Oi!Oi! Some American carp fishers commitment to the whole Anglo/ Brito-phile is near the level one might call Anglophelia. You can tell who they are too. First off they can be seen in their olive or dark brown regalia. They are on the level of the Bro-Vets who rock “Molon Labe”. Then there is the requisite pose looking down and thoughtfully at your fish. We know it was the only one you got that day. Then there is the bucket hat, seriously? Are you guys Gilligan are you on a desert island? But, it is on levels with guys in the US and assembling their AR-15’s and their whole schitck. I guess if you want to spend beaucoup money on camping gear imported from the UK at inflated prices then have it. Then there is the insistence on using the vocabulary of the UK calling everything out “swims, bivvies, etc”. I got it I guess it makes you an interesting thinking angler. Not really. Give it up. Carp Fishing has been done at pay lakes here in the south longer than it has been hot in the UK!

So you know I learned on my own with my “specimen” net, yes that is the UK term for it. I guess I wasn’t using it right. Cool I got it. But, this guy instead of answering a private message he decided to be a douche and talk shit openly. I give it to him I did post on his page and I had that coming.

This leads me to the next topic with American carpers. Carp care. Seriously this dude blew me up over it. Now I am sorry that my “carp care” sucks, guess what cyprinus carpio have been around for a very long time. You know why? They have evolved and adapted to their surroundings. Do you really think that dragging them or any “stress” they go through is really going to affect them when they get back in the water? Especially when the water is probably rife with pollutants. Do you really think gently pouring water over them in their special carp bed is going to increase the quality of their life? Do you really think putting antiseptic on their cuts is really going to do anything? No my friend that is man’s narcissism. I am sure they do that in the UK with everyone eyeballing each other’s catch with 100 dudes packed around a little pond I can see why you have to make a good showing. Get over yourself. I guess that is the shit you say to get chummy with our angling brethren from across the pond. Funny saying all that especially when carp inhabit waters that are far from pristine.

This is all minor though, if we are going to talk about sportsmanship. Let’s think about it this carp “angling” presents about as much as sportsmanship as…..maybe surf fishing. Although I think stripper fishing is sporting but surf fish finders are on the carp level. Okay so all other aspects considered already sitting in lawn chairs, with rod holders, and electric bite alarms. Those bite alarms are what make it the most sporting of all methods of fishing for carp. So get over it there is no sport in that. The only dude that will agree with you are “wankers” from the UK.

So since I made the mistake of posting up on this guy’s page I have given pause as to how I have been fishing. I have taken a lot of crap for fishing for carp in the above described manner and my family is big on sportsmanship. So no matter what size fish I would send them the first question always is, “was it on the fly.” Then I have to cop to the fact that UK style fishing is for the ignoramus. As much as the CAG and made up groups like NYCA want to see their sport grow, it won’t because of them. Because, in the end no matter what platitudes you put out about it, it is not sporting and most of the people around the sport suck because of the above reasons.

I think the guy who called me out was a wee bit jealous of my film skills. He will probably be jealous of my writing skills as well. It’s okay. Laridae adventures has just been lazy the last few months but we are going to be back in all our glory this fall and there will be no more of this UK style nonsense.

If you are going to fish carp here in America and get props the only way that happens is on the fly. I realized I was messed up when my friends and family responded to my catches with their own carp….on light lines.



I have to tell you that after 43 years, I have never had a vision like I did tonight while I was sleeping. I think that it might be the result of coming to a cross roads in my life and deciding what direction I need to go in. So here it is for you to read and decide. Or maybe I am just crazy.

I would have thought it was a dream at first but dreams have never been this real for me before. After I had this at about 2343 I couldn’t go back to sleep because I was so happy and baffled at the same time. Before I get into the meaning I have assigned to it let me explain it the best I can before it slips into the mist of my memory.

The dream started off in what I could only imagine as either Pueblo or ABQ. I was walking along in a dilapidated part of town however I noticed there was an old huge water slide/entertainment/skate park. Now it was very old built solid with those kinds of big smooth bricks that you find in old schools and the windows the same with those big aluminum framed windows with dusty screens. Anyway I found out there was a competition there and I decided to partake. This competition was stupid I walked from the bottom of the water slide up to the top of this hill and it was a very long hike. I would land up going up and down this huge water slide about three times. So somehow I had clothes on when I got to the bottom. I would change back out at the top.

When I got done competing it was strange, there was a building surrounding the upper level of the water slide. It is all the same style architecture, old 1970’s school big brick. Like the middle school that I attended. I am walking around and there are a few people there and I see that it is messy and crawl across a few tables to clean up old magazines and such. I guess this catches the notice of a guy that for some reason reminds me a lot of Samuel L Jackson in Django. Except, he is wearing one of those 1970’s plaid suits. He tells me come with him he has something to show me.

We are in this same dilapidated neighborhood. But there is a hill with this huge imposing series of brick buildings. I mean these buildings are clean on the outside. They look like they could be some kind of old apartment buildings. Two of the huge buildings are bristling with balconies and what not. You could tell that they hadn’t been inhabited for a long time. But, they weren’t ruins either. After we pass by them there are two smaller buildings behind them. By small I mean the front buildings were maybe ten stories and the others where about half that.

We go into the bottom of one of the smaller buildings toward the back corner of this huge complex. It is full of life on the bottom floor. It seems that he is going to take me on a walk of what I could only describe as some kind of clinic with a lot of sick people laying down and sitting in the waiting room. He tells me, “It’s my mission to take care of these people.” So I respond, “Okay”. I don’t know why he is showing me all this. As we were walking up to these buildings I start to have this feeling that all of these buildings can be restored to their former glory. I mean these buildings although run down I could tell that they had potential. When I say I felt this I mean I felt this in my mind, body and soul. As if this was a fact that could not be disputed. I have never had a feeling like that before in a dream. I mean that feeling was concrete. It was like I was watching a panoramic drone shot of how huge these buildings were and I didn’t see them as run down but I could see and feel how they were going to look.

For some reason we walk to second floor of the building that we are in. I am by myself on the second floor and I get to the last room of the floor and I look up and there is one of those firefighter poles going up three more floors. And on the next floor this same guy I am talking to and peaking over the edge, asks me if I like this place. I am respond in the affirmative. He is like that is good because I own all of it. My heart almost stops. I am like how does this dude own all this. He tells me if I want I can live here. I respond, “Hell yeah!”

We leave this building and we are walking in front of the other three buildings and it is clean but urban and the bottom floors are filled with those two story glass window all the way across from beginning to end. We walk in and out of them and look at a few of the units. There are people living here and there interspersed in them. The plumbing is running and there is light but these are run down but somehow solidly beautiful under that brick work. It as if my view keeps switching between aerial and where I am standing.

At this point I am jabber at this man that I can make this place beautiful again. When I am saying this he is telling me, “You can do it and you will do it. I believe you will.” He basically tells me to get it done. Not with a mean tone but as if he has complete faith in me and my vision of not what this place is but what this place could be. Not that kind of weak condescending type of agreement when he says what he has to it is as if he believes me the same as I believe in what I am seeing and saying. I am so touched by him telling me this I am balling my eyes out; these are tears of overwhelming joy. It was as if years of pain and self-doubt were lifting from me. That the horizon was clear and that there was nothing but infinite beginnings and ends. The only thing that I could feel is joy and love. As if I could feel how everything fits together perfectly.

I woke up from this dream at 2343 and would you believe it if I told you that I was actually crying. My eyes and pillow was soaked with tears. However, as crazy as this may seem I know that tonight that the universe had something to tell me. That as much at some points in my life I have failed to believe in myself and my vision, the universe has never lost faith in me. I couldn’t go back to sleep after this and had to take a shower and seriously think about what had just happened and write it all down. I have lived my life everyday sometimes to my benefit and sometimes to my detriment by my own internal script. I have seriously doubted myself and seriously had fits of over confidence as well. I knew after this dream that I had just been touched on the shoulder and reminded that I can never stop believing in my vision. No matter where it leads me.